When Dreams Meet Reality: A Coach’s Honest Reflection
What do you do when reality doesn’t match your expectations? When the path forward feels unclear and the destination seems further away than when you started?
Today marked my third and final mentor session for the coaching program I’m graduating from. I walked in with genuine excitement, convinced this would be “the one”-the session where everything would click into place. I’d made deliberate changes to my approach, and I was ready to demonstrate my growth.
Then came those crushing words: “Can we stop here?”
My heart froze as my mentor explained that my session sounded more therapeutic than goal-oriented. While I asked powerful questions, I wasn’t being direct enough in helping clients nail down specific topics. Instead of facilitating focused progress, I had become a sounding board for emotional processing.
The feedback hit hard. Here I was, with three precious opportunities to get it right, and I felt like I’d missed the mark every time. Three shots. Three attempts to prove I belong in this field. And now, facing my final chance without additional fees, I’m left wondering: what next?
Adding salt to the wound, I’m still waiting to hear back about a scholarship program I applied for. The silence is deafening.
This moment has me questioning everything. Am I cut out for this work? Is coaching truly my lane, or am I fooling myself? The doubt creeps in, whispering that maybe I’m not “coach enough” to succeed in this field.
As someone who guides others through their challenges, I feel obligated to be transparent about my own struggles. Right now, I’m sitting in a space of defeat and sadness. I feel like I’ve let myself down, disappointed my family, and even failed God. It’s a heavy, lonely place to be in.
I find myself praying for guidance from the Holy Spirit, asking for direction when God feels silent. This isn’t the polished, inspirational content you might expect from a life coach- it’s raw honesty about the messy middle of pursuing your calling.
So what does one do when reconciling with undesirable realities? When the gap between where you are and where you want to be feels impossibly wide?
For now, I write. I process. I acknowledge that growth rarely follows a straight line, and mastery isn’t achieved in three sessions. Perhaps the real lesson isn’t in getting it “right” immediately, but in learning to navigate the space between effort and outcome, between aspiration and current reality.
This reflection serves as a reminder that even coaches need coaching, even guides sometimes lose their way, and even the strongest among us have moments of doubt. The question isn’t whether we’ll face setbacks-it’s how we’ll respond when we do.
Maybe the path forward isn’t about having all the answers right now. Maybe it’s about sitting with the discomfort, trusting the process, and remembering that every expert was once a beginner who refused to give up.
The journey continues, one imperfect step at a time.
stay well.
Nia
